Oh, I thought of so many words that start with C! Like CRAZY, which I am going, all of the time. Or CRUEL, which is what so many people are to people with autism, which is in this story that I have seen 90,000 times on Facebook, but which I am not reading, because, what is the point? I have seen enough stories on the news, with teachers and teachers assistants doing stuff to kids with autism in the name of security. There was the story where a teacher's assistant attempted to give an autistic child a candy with peanuts, because she knew he was allergic and she thought if he had a reaction, he wouldn't go on the scheduled field trip. Of course, it could have KILLED HIM, too, but I guess she didn't care about that? That's cruel, right? Even if he was *horribly* behaved, we can't go around KILLING badly behaved children! If we could, I would have to put my kids in protective custody, ha! There is another story, where a teacher was suspended but put back in her job, after she put a child in a chair and then tipped the chair over. Ay yi yi, on and on, people are jerks! I know! I don't need to read some letter that some jerk wrote to a neighbor, a family who has a child with autism to know that.
So, anyway, crazy is out, even though I am crazy. I just tried to lay down to do my stupid 100 situps a day in a vain attempt to get in some kind of decent shape and Felicity sat down right on my face and THEN she dove backward and I had to catch her. My face still hurts and I am SICK of these two younger girls! Who in the hell thought it was a good idea for preschool to start WEEKS after regular school? Anyway.
And probably cruel should be out, because maybe we shouldn't have such negativity, right? So how about Community? I have found a nice community of people who know what I am talking about when I talk about Anthony, late toilet training, constant nakedness, ABA therapy, occupational therapy, etc., etc. Mostly I have found that community online, through other blogs and Twitter but who cares? It can be challenging, because just like if you know one child with autism, you know one child with autism, if you know one mom of a child with autism, you know ONE mom of a child with autism, but sometimes it's enough.
So here are some blogs that I read regularly, in no particular order:
Stimeyland, We Go With Him, Fragile X Files, Love That Max (I especially like that this blog does a special needs roundup on Fridays, so you can read a lot of other blogs too). One thing I read right when Anthony was diagnosed was that you should stop reading development books, because they can be really depressing. I have moaned for years about seeing other kids Anthony's age playing soccer, going to school, making their First Communions, etc., it can be *very* difficult. I find it's easier to find some people who are in your same situation and start comparing your lives to theirs! Ha, not really, the devil is comparison, but what I mean is part of reorganizing your standards and expectations is to surround yourself with people who are in the same boat.
And listen. It is hard, with autism, to find people who are like minded, EXACTLY like minded. Some people only want to talk about vaccines, some people love and some people hate that stupid Jenny McCarthy (I fall in that latter category, obviously). But you have to just realize that there are more things you have in common than you don't. Don't be alone, find a community, wherever that is. It ends up to be really, really important.